Lately a few of my female friends have gone thru some rough times with their partners. Unfortunately time has left me jaded from similar experiences, an I wasn’t my best me in giving feedback. I instantly got angry because I hate stories of violated trust. I hate the suffering felt afterwards, an I gave advice that basically said “Band aid it! Cover it up!”
The absolute truth is these women need to feel these experiences. It’s perfectly okay to cry when you are angry. It is fine to be angry and go on hike and yell it out (can you tell howling is not only something my dog friends do?!?) It’s fine to bond with other female friends and do things to feel beautiful & whole again.
(Take this with salt because I’m not a mental health professional, I’m a person who is a dog trainer and was probably a canine member in a previous life lol. I’m no guru)
I will say that when someone closes a door on you, don’t try to pry it open. Feel free to scream at it, if they have ever laid a hand on you, please BURN it. Life will give us lesson that we have got to get up from and walk away. If the door pops up again when we have processed our feelings, we might be in the space to crack it open and hear what it’s got to say.
Remember you don’t have revolving doors, you have a sacred space. You are entitled to lock them when someone bails on you, and build a new entrance. Even if you feel trapped in the same plane with that person (same job,house,friends,maybe shared family) you are not obligated to be who you were for them.
So grow wings,butterflies! Just keep flying, your destination is still ahead of you even though there’s turbulence.
I hope you enter the new year fresh, I hope you enter it with a feeling.
And you do what gets you there.
Have a Peaceful,Safe New Year!